One door is closed, another is open: Making your comeback from a setback

You may have heard of Bob Marley. He is the Jamaican philosopher/reggae superstar who has penned many memorable songs including one of my favorites:  Coming in from the Cold. In this particular song,  Marley queries, “Why do you look so sad and forsaken?”  Then, without waiting for an answer, Marley offers up some sound advice in the form of a rhetorical question:  “When one door is closed, don’t you know another is open?”

For many of us, when a door closes, we feel our world has come to an abrupt end, even when it’s US who consciously decided to close the door on a particular chapter of our lives. No matter the reasons or circumstances for a closed door, take care not to lose hope.  Not to see an end, rather to look for another entry.

Though often unwelcome and unexpected, change is inevitable. Shifting attention from what we’ve lost or have been shut off from to what we still have in hand or what we can achieve through another door can be very difficult.  As Bob Marley says, we get “sad and forsaken” because we desperately want to hold on to what we have in hand instead of venturing into the dreaded unknown.  The truth is that if the door is closed, locked, sealed forever, continuing to focus on it expecting to find a way in will be a grand waste of time.   We have no choice but to recalculate our path forward.

Of course, I understand the dilemma.  Over the last three years, we have seen investments evaporate in the stock markett, jobs sail overseas.  We grapple with trepidation and uncertainty about what the future holds.

Many people with a mortgage, car note, and kids to put through college have found themselves on one side of a sealed door while their lifesavings or assumed earnings are on the other.  Finding yourself in such a predicament can be unnerving at best, but grousing or brooding has yet to bring even one job back. When the door slams on a current opportunity, start looking towards an alternative entry.

The new door represents a chance to learn new skills, a chance to improve yourself, remake yourself to achieve gainful employment.  Instead of fixating on what could have been, tap your imagination to see what can still be.  Search your soul to rediscover what it is you truly want to get out of life and, perhaps more importantly, to put into life.   When you find yourself “locked out” or “sealed off” from your presumed life path, get creative.  Take action.

The stories of folks who have lost their jobs, retooled themselves, and found employment in a different industry or who have become self-made entrepreneurs are myriad and inspiring.  I recently read a story about a woman named Maura Jarve. She got laid off from her job while on maternity leave.  Maternity leave! Did she become angry and vengeful?  In fact, she did.  But only initially.  She quickly refocused.  Rather than fretting over the fact that a door had just closed on her. She looked for new way forward, a door that led to a path to owning her own company.  Now she employs her creative genius and others to help small and medium sized companies build their brands and create better images of who they are and what they can do.  In other words, instead of bringing herself down, she’s uplifting others… and getting paid for it!

The lesson learned:  do not crawl into a shell and hide with shame because you lost your savings, your job, or both.  Do not dwell on blaming your boss, the government… the cruel and unjust universe!  Instead, decide that it is time to work harder, increase your focus and determination. Redirect your anger and frustration. Take the knowledge and experience you have garnered from this lost opportunity and compress it into a platform that you can stand on to see the future, a launching pad that will propel you toward higher goals, faster and more efficiently.

Keep On Pushing!

Copyright © 2017 Devon Harris & Associates LLC 2017

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